3 deer just ran past us on the street. At least I get to see some tail tonight
Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.
if all i could do was poop and smoke weed, i'd be eternally happy
amen to that sister
I jsut got pulled over and passed the sobritaty test.
Good thing spelling doesn't count.
Good ideas don't start with we have a bottle of vodka..
Nope. Can't afford girlfriends. Still looking for the 25 year old bisexual tripled who owns a brewery or a casino.. the search continues....
i had to get the starbucks manager to open the bathroom door for me...you passed out on the floor, the things i do for you
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
Luke did at least 8 shots of pure mayonnaise last night. I am not sure if that is better or worse than my 2 cement mixers?
I got sucker punched while I was making out with some girl...I think my molar might have flown into her mouth
I'm actually more excited that I had so much sex this weekend that my ovaries hurt
it doesn't matter what you do now, you will forever be known as the girl who fell off the roof
nooooo! we need to brain storm. I need rebranding....what if I start always showing up with my cat or a wacky hat?
try again roofio
just made a presentation to 40 students and my professor about morals and ethical issues..still drunk. at 8am. I wish I could remember how it went.
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