Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
Your TV has the DVD menu for White Chicks permanently burned into the screen. I can't anymore. That's just a whole different level that I cannot comprehend.
My mom walked down and caught me drinking by myself, watching the nanny at 3:30AM. I had no idea what to say
Last night we hooked up in nothing but out UK shirts during half time. Never say I'm not a dedicated fan again.
If our dicks could shake hands in congratulations they would
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
It all boils down to, who else do we know that is willing to buy our friendship?
Had to go to the urgent for a physical and I gave them my fake. Nurse was a sport though
Found my id. It was in the cats litter box. Seriously what was last night.
So to add to headbutting the microwave while waiting for my hot pockets to cook. I apparently told both bartenders earlier in the night I was going to fuck them both. I hate black out drunk me..
Yeah. I don't know. I'm just gonna show up at her place on valentines day with a jock strap, box of chocolates, and rose clenched between my ass cheeks with "be mine" written across my glorious man titties.
He called me baby cakes during sex... Can U not
I'm sure the lady doing my pedicure could smell the sex on me.
I don't think I'm ever gonna need a boyfriend again. I have a body pillow, a vibrator, and I'm strong enough to open my own jars.
His mom wants to come see the dorm.
Hide the whip.
Randomize
