Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
Whoa! I think of you when I eat cottage cheese.
now there's a facebook group for all the people whose lives i've ruined
i just remembered the time you guys tried to give me an intervention because i was drunk before 5 on a monday
Shes been standing with her arms crossed in front of the mirror for 45 minutes...she told me she's "getting sober"
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
I should know better than to trust a man I've seen cry on multiple occasions to give me accurate sports information.
Update... last night a man tried to bite my ear. I think he swallowed my pearl earring.
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
I can't wet the bed. That was the old me. I'm grown
Oh my god
how is it that I keep meeting up with you when Im drunk?
you stand on my porch screaming my name until I come out with you...
It wasnt until i started dancing that i realized i pissed myself dude. I dont think shes gonna call me back.
What if he stabs me in the back, mid-orgasm, as I sit on his face? It'd be a miraculous way to go but that's not the point
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
ok, muffins say "love me", waffles say "fuck me", got it.
Randomize
