We're facebook friends in real life
that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
every time you feel disappointed with the red wings take a shot
Her gag reflex was as absent as a father figure must have been in her childhood
Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
Completly hung over at midnight, I knew there was a downside to drinking at 2pm
I'm shutting down my vagina temporarily...it's like the last two weeks were a going out of business sale...and now it needs a break...
The liquor store wont accept checks from us anymore.
Well i'm not entirely sure considering he gave my vagina an early valentine's day card that said "you're purrfect."
He went bowling in his bathroom.. And shattered the toilet.
My right arm is handcuffed to my leg... Please help.
And I can taste the vodka through my ears. Good god.
I stole something. Which direction out are you guys gonna go
I did put on a shirt to start the night, right?
Wait you took his virginity AND broke his bed doing it
I know! I’m the best!
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