Reminder- he's a douche bag. A big one.
CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
Problem: At home sick with a stomach virus. Solution: smoke weed all day...
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
just did a beer bong in the shower while i was taking an actual shower its officially football time
The sex was so bad. I kept sending people snapchats of my face during it.
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
OMG -- There are strippers in the bathroom crying because their power moves aren't good enough to win the competition
who are you talking about my vagina to?!
Fire trucks are here again. It wasn't me this time.
I appreciate your acceptance of my lack of morals
When you sleep in the bathroom, you're no longer a guest.
He asked me what I wanted for Christmas. I told him an orgasm would be nice.
Why is there a wet sock in my garbage? Why did I chug so much red wine? Why was someone signing into my iCloud account at 4 am in China? Why do I do self-destructive reckless things? So many questions.
You need to stop showing people the things i drunk-text to you... i have a reputation to uphold here
Randomize
