Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
Oh and then this old man who saw it happen goes "don't do that"
Hahaha what a helpful old man. Like you thought it was normal to be spilling gas everywhere.
Any girl that compares her vag to a hot ham sandwich is beyond a slut
Got a basket, 50 condoms, some candy, 100 plastic eggs & my bunny costume. Campus will feel my wrath in 2 weeks
throwing condoms aimed at his crotch probably isn't the politest way to ask for sex
please tell me i can get drunk off sparkling grape juice. even if you have to lie, please say yes.
you grabbed the waitors dick and yelled '2nd base' and then he gave you his number. I hate your life.
she vomitted in her champagne, said "fuck it, it's new years", and continued drinking.
If you don't want me in your apartment then lock your door better
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
She's trying to sext her husband for the first time. I'm feeding her lines. It is 3 am and I am playing Cyrano for my wasted big sister TELL ME I AM NOT THE BEST SISTER IN LAW ON THE PLANET.
That tampon felt like a stick in my vagina, I am never making a drunken tampon choice again. Friends don't let friends choose tampons drunk.
the hole that the tears left- fill it with pizza
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
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