OMG! Someone dumped chocolate soft-serve in the bathroom! Dibs!
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
Hes far too high and trying to explain daylight savings time to me. Help?
i couldnt tell she was wearing a bumpit until she started giving me head
You tried to pay the bartender in graduation checks, I think you'll be fine in the real world.
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
we weren't quite sure what was on that mirror, so we snorted it and hoped for the best
I'm confused about why you felt the need to ask me to buy you life alert for christmas at 3:28 this morning.
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
pretend your vagina is a choco taco and the guy is someone who really loves choco tacos. let him enjoy the choco taco.
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
I'm shopping for Mother's Day cards while waiting for my herpes medication. What is life.
Just laying in bed, snuggling my cat, and pondering whether I'd like to attend a swingers party this evening...
He stuck a cigarette in my butt last night. There is no coming back from that.
I guess I asked for the two old strippers numbers at the end of the bar and it turned out to be the bartenders mom and aunt...
Randomize
