Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
Why did you take off so early
No more beer. And also. Threesome. Maybe. Ill let you know.
he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
I wish alcohol would automatically work as birth control if you have sex drunk.
One of us needs to be functional tomorrow and it won't be me. I'm drinking liquor out of a fishbowl.
Dude i was hungover i didnt know she was in the shower, she screamed i screamed we all screamed and i just so happend to piss in the shower.
we spent fifteen minutes trying to convince you that you weren't locked inside of your car
All i've had today is coffee and ketchup packets. I need a job like yesterday.
I'm a wonderful, drunk angel of hydration and sometimes absinthe.
i passed out twice in the shower, twice on the bathroom floor, once holding the toilet bowl and 8 times moving from the bathroom to my bed. Tequila sucks.
Based on your 5AM twitter activity I gather you found MORE FREE COKE??
The resort was totally empty, just June and I. Which of course lead to EXCESSIVE day drinking and outdoor fucking. FYI Dominicans LOVE to watch.
Let's stay in this weekend and play drinking games to the Winter Olympics.
As long as we can drink anytime we see a stray dog, mafia looking Russian or double toilet.
Just so were clear your wife is cut off from my dick.
Randomize
