I like how you formally end text interactions, just turn your phone off or don't respond you pervert
he thought i was a dude.
Good thing you left when you did - ended up getting banned from jimmy johns.
do herpes really smell.
then the nurse gave me a bag with my personal belongings: phone, wallet. jacket, keys and a BTB burrito
just found my calculator watch from 6th grade. the hipster transformation is complete
Judging by what's in the bathroom right now, I see you graced us with your presence last night.
As I was puking last night I told them "it's ok I'm a paramedic"
The view from the bathroom floor this morning is fabulous
Chinese roommate asked me this a.m when u left if all girls here have multiple boyfriends..
My public calorie counter app is pretty much just a cry for help.
FYI: Brian said he left me in the bathroom Friday night to shower and 45 minutes later found me with a towel around my head, my pants on and holding my boobs. No more Jell-O shots for me.
Like people might wonder why I put up with your puns. You give good head and play with my hair
I'm not gonna lie. I need sex like plants need water right now. I just need the dick.
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
Randomize
