It was like a fairy tale, until he tried to put it in my ass...
She gave me a bj in her parent's kitchen while I ate the rest of her mom's birthday cake. Fuck. Yes.
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
You said that about some fat chick sitting on the base of a lamp post and puking. Downright heroic.
it's not like this is the first time she's brought a guy home and I'm the one who hooks up with him
Night just started and I've already seen a woman headbutt a brick wall. Unintentionally. Epic to say the least
I faked an orgasm during phone sex last night. This relationship is starting to become real.
How do I tell your little brother I lost my virginity wearing nothing but his socks?
Formal letter or email.
Martha Stewart has had a one night stand and is unsure if she's had a threesome. I no longer feel slutty.
new dating motto: let your guard down, not your panties
I feel like a sex bomb and I need to go explode on somebody
Your phone just changed "liver" to "liquor" how dose that make you feel
No we didn't fuck. He picked me up I asked where we were going and he said "I don't know if you've ever heard of a little place called Denny's?" He was completely serious. I told him to stop the car and I got out and called Jack.
There are only a few things more freaky than wandering around a zoo drunk.
It may be a corded vibrator from the 90s but it gets the job DONE
Randomize
