No. I broke it. Note to self, never take a shower with your phone in your pocket.
she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
I like how you try to look sexy and just end up looking like a weird boy.
For future reference, never invite the people you met at Dunkin Donuts at 2am to your house to watch Dogma
She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..
we tried to steal a tractor last night. you should have come out.
Just picked them up. It took 6 holes and a handle of rum to evolve from golf to a demolition derby.
There's an entire pit crew of cart boys surveying the golf cart destruction.
No our divorce decree will not have a blow job clause. Unless my alimony is greatly increased your bj's have been reduced to fantasy status.....
You had the nerve to crowd surf to your own bedroom.. I guess watching Aladdin high was probably the best idea ever
I was going through my settings and the phone randomly started playing "Crazy Little Thing Called Love" by Dwight Yoakum. Out loud. At full volume. I was shitting. There were 3 other people in the bathroom. I love iOS 7.
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
Lack of response to this text gains you a half hour of freedom before I initiate operations to conclude you are not, in fact, comatose. You requested no mercy.
Fuck you and your widespread penis snapchat
I wish so many great beards were not attached to even greater jerks. All that face sitting potential wasted. Some of the greatest tragedies of this century.
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