when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
So I thought I was doing pretty good and then I sneezed and prematurely ejaculated...
I love him more than I love myself. Which is a lot...Because I'm narcissistic.
He told me he finished so fast because he's a sprinter. I hate athletes who are really just pussies.
A piece of cheeseburger just fell between my tits. Consider this a "wish you were here" postcard.
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
OH DEAR GOD. He looks like if u licked him he'd taste like bourbon, sex and sunshine.
Since I fall down so much at parties I've started doing this new thing where when I fall I just yell FLOOR PARTY and make people bring the party to me
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
Death by dick. An honorable death. Put a picture of his dick in the photo collage at my funeral.
Last night was a sign that I need to stop sleeping with any girl that can quote the mighty ducks
Specially the ones that look like Goldberg
listen. i haven't sucked a dick in well over three years but i believe in myself.
My mom has tinder, she is 45 and has her age setting at 18-29. And she still gets more matches than me
Randomize
