That's when you crack a 10am beer
Puking blue powerade in mcdonalds parking lot to the applause of the guy taking out the trash with man in the mirror blasting in the background. Good morning stl
you puked in the cab and all over yourself and tried to convince the cabby it was there already when he got upset... then you puked again. not too convincing are you
is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
I really don't understand how I cannot figure out how to work a fucking can opener when I'm hungover. Yet I still retained the ability to take a perfectly symmetrical picture of my erect penis and send it to every person in Matt's contacts the night before.
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
just a question.. totally understand if you dont know what im talking about.. but.. do you have my funnel? i think i tucked it in to your bed last night.
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
Sorry, not ignoring you.. We broke open the other piñata left from cinco de mayo and it was filled with condoms, mini booze bottles, and those little party horn things you blow into. You'll forgive me when we're fucking for days with all these free condoms.
A bee came out of the shoe box and stung her. Even the insect community doesn't want her in those hideous things.
I need Mexican food. Like, I'd take it through a needle at this point. It's totally worth the track marks.
I smoked all his weed and he hasn't noticed yet. But I might need a place to crash when he does
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
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