I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
Dear everyone that texted me last night wondering where i was. i ended up face down blacked up drunk before i made it to the party. My bad
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
SO stoned. Sitting in just a thong in front of a fan. NO work for a WEEK! Life is good :)
I don't remember coming home but there is cereal EVERYWHERE
did i have both of my shoes on when the bouncer threw us out last night?
He always grinds on me and is like "This is awesome because we're both Catholic!"
How did you get a free t-shirt at the strip club?
I was attacked by whores
You threw up on yourself again didn't you?
They were strong whores
No just a slight sexual miscommunication which led to a little (lot) vomiting by one party and a bruised sternum on the other party involved.
I can't even make a guess how that goes.
It was a "my chaser needed a chaser" kind of night
I sent you a snap of me in the bath, and you sent me a snap of a taco. An actual taco.
you're no funn. i shall go consult my friend vodka on this matter.
You guys had reggaeton music playing while dry humping? Definition of romance.
I just showed this kid my nipples to work my shift tmw
I'm shrooming way too hard to deal with your bullshit at this particular point in time
Randomize
