i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
Sitting in class thinking wow im glad im not hungover...and then i realized im still drunk.
my roomate judo was messing around with a girl who recently had a kid, when he was sucking her tits milk came out lmao
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
Only you could be admitted to the ER and walk out with a nurse's phone number. I wish I was gay
You know when the three of us hug it out in the alcohol isle in walmart it's gonna be fun.
Who's nuvaring is under my pillow?
I've come to the conclusion that Jesus and 2013 are haters.
Want to go swimsuit shopping? First one who cries buys ice cream.
We found him. He was passed out in a McDonalds booth with at least 6 big Mac wrappers. The employee said he kept yelling that he was in America and had the freedom to have big macs. Fucking Italians...
My inner pteradactyl is also confused.
We're currently sharing pics of our cats. I can't wait to sit on her face.
That's it. I'm moving to LA & sitting on his face.
Holy shit dude........stairs
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
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