The Lord gave Farrah Fawcett 1 wish when she died. She wished that all children in the world would be safe! The Lord granted her wish and killed Michael Jackson.
I didn't wanna be that girl that took a shit in the ocean..
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
He puked on the grill while the burgers were on. We had to go to taco bell
He's high as balls tripping balls and doing a reenactment of the scene where Buzz jumps off the balcony and can't fly to his soundtrack of Toy Story.
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
I just power smoked 3 bongs, ate hot cocoa mix before making hot cocoa, and realized James Spader's character on The Office reminds me of your mom.
If you think for one second that I would forget Mardi Gras, you clearly don't know how much I love boobs.
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
I'm drinking your booze since you ate my pop-tarts. I'm telling you this because I still don't think it's a fair trade.
Oh wow and I have a bunch of portable wine glasses called to go coffee cups
Dreamt I had my own personal vibrator rep, who made house calls. I earned an upgrade to an electric model, since I was burning through batteries. That's it. Time for a bf.
She's asleep in a fisher-price toy car
Sorry I can't pick up... thought process is fine but too stoned to form words.
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
Randomize
