he just said he'd buy the porn
its a step up from the last guy
i found you on the dancefloor with your cell phone to your ear saying that you didn't like the music they played at the club so you were going to listen to your own
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
In the middle of having sex, she said "if we continue, we're dating." I then pulled out and sat in the corner, naked. I deserve a Medal of Honor.
please bring me a paper towel asap.
I was drinking wine in bed and spilt some on my chest.. And I cautiously guided it into my belly button but now I dont know what to do.
Why is there a chicken nugget nailed to my front door?
Today, my boyfriend informed me that I look like my dad when I orgasm
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
I almost put an adult beverage in my sippy cup for the beach but realized the next step would be rehab.
No the next step is being buzzed at the beach. I would've.
I dunno, there's just something so\ncomforting about having his penis in my mouth.
like when you break up with someone your virginity slowly starts to grow back & when it's done it's like ding ding ding you're ready to date again
he was wearing a pyjama shirt under a dress shirt under a hoodie under a robe under a rain poncho the man was prepared for anything
After 3 parties, all of them busted, and 4 field sobriety tests, I AM the cop whisperer
He had a tattoo of a crown above his penis. He was AMAZING! It was well deserved. LONG LIVE THE KING!
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