Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
just found my calculator watch from 6th grade. the hipster transformation is complete
you have to give me like a days notice for these kinds of things, you cant just call at 9 am and expect me to be sober
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
Dont worry about the blood on the pillow. its from my face.
They wouldn't let me go to sleep at the police station while I was waiting to bail u out. YOU OWE ME
I cannot even. Taco bell reception. Beers. New friends from Georgia.
His words said "save me", but his penis said "I'll take my chances"
Sometimes I feel like I should become a beautician purely for my ability to shave pretty shapes into my pubic hair.
I want to be "performing a disservice to society by actually wearing clothes in public" hot.
The bottle brush for the bong worked really well to clean the brownies out of the waffle maker.
For both our sake, we've decided to ban watching combat sports before sex
Ugh. I just found a cum stain on my mermaid pants. Now I can't return them.
That's why my boobs are so big, they're full of secrets.
I need some buff guys to cuddle me and call me precious
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