My bed smells like naked
Haha. At least it doesn't smell like herpes
Drunk and had dance off with 8 year old. Lost. Still drinking
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.
I'd rather make snow angels in a pool of elephant shit.than sleep with him.
No, you don't understand. If the words "stop," "alcohol poisoning," and "regret" aren't in the same sentence by the end of the night, I will have failed this birthday.
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
HE'S BRINGING FRIED MAC AND CHEESE BITES. I GET FRIED MAC AND CHEESE AND SEX PEOPLE. BEST WEDNESDAY EVER.
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
Goodnight Shia. Goodnight Moon.
These tits shall not be calmed
like, there should be nothing wrong with me wanting to watch you put on a bikini and roll around in a kiddie pool of jello
so, i take that as a legit invitation into his pants
So the makeout sesh? Not so great. His stubble rubbed my face raw, he tried to push me towards auto-erotic asphyxiation, and he licked my forehead. Twice.
Randomize
