Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
I'm at the store buying plan b and vodka
the cocktail of hope
some guy just got out of his chair quietly. Laid down on the floor and is now asleep in between rows in my lecture hall. He must have had a rough night.
she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.
Once you realized you couldn't finish the 30 you started walking down the street and leaving a beer in everyone's mailbox
im not gonna bother asking u how it was... we could hear u through the walls
We've been broken up for 7 months. His mom sent me a card with a brochure inside titled "How at Risk for STD's are you?"
Why is there blood and lettuce everywhere?
TAKE ALL THE MAERHMALLOWS AND PUT THEM ALL IN THE MAGICAL NIGHTSTAND
I JUST MACED MY OWN FACE
This is by far the best text I have ever woken up to.
do you know how hard it is to walk a mile drunk on 151 it's hard yards are soft and every girl looks good
He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it
The magician guy on probation is here at the bar. I'm gonna get him to show me a trick
Randomize
