I'm at a bar that has girls so awful looking even you would not have sex with them.
Well... I doubt that.
She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
he broke up with me so i peed in his bed
I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
im having a threesome with these popsicles
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
I would give up sex for lent, but I think Jesus would understand that I went too long without it to go back now.
she asked me which thongs i though her boyfriend would like best. fuck the friend zone
I never thought I'd say this but my vagina is taking a serious break for awhile
Alright, my brain isn't sure how to properly function on a Wednesday with no hangover and more than 3 hours of sleep.
Some girl took her panties off, soaked them in vodka and wrung them out into a line of guys' mouths! Awesome!
No, NOT awesome. Where the fuck do you go drinking!?!
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
who orders an old fashioned in 2014? even my Grandparents think you're an asshole.
HE WAS SUPPOSED TO BE THE TROPHY HUSBAND! I WAS GOING TO BE THE SUCCESSFUL ONE!
It's a race to see if I finish the bottle first or my homework
Randomize
