I can't believe he cheated
Whatever. Anytime she has an orgasm, it's because I taught him how
you know your drunk when 7 soccer players cant catch up to a tranny in high heels who just stole your wallet
reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
IM PICKING UP BLOW FOR US STOP WHINING ABOUT SEX
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
He stole all of his parent's vodka WHILE they were in the room, and then opened the window and snuck out. I was watching from my truck
I guess I look like the kind of girl who would buy edible, weed-infused lube.
I need to start using my boobs for good instead of weed. Although really they're kind of the same thing
my night stand is a mini fridge, dont even try to get on my level of laziness.
we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.
Let's celebrate that I used a condom
I got a charlie horse in my ass while masturbating. We are never been going to that boot camp again.
I just balanced a full glass of chocolate milk on my left boob. Don't think i've ever been more proud.
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