The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
I let him watch sportscenter while we fucked. How did he repay me? I'm now missing class to get a shot in the ass for the clap. You and I are getting wasted and keying someone's car this weekend.
I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
Please tell me how I go from a guy with a coke problem to a cop. My own life doesn't even make sense to me anymore
Ladies and gentlemen, the only person I know who would keg stand in pearls and a bow.
I'm supposed to nail the old lady at 1:30 so I'll see you at 1:35ish.
Quote from doctor, "that is a VERY angry vagina".
I'm fucked.
On the flip side Weston asked if he could move me to Wisconsin to be his "moto hoe" which is actually a thing apparently
This has to be the weirdest conversation I've ever had sober and in the middle of the day before.
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
I don't know if the puke on my pants is mine or not
Where you at? Come home and endure this shit show called "The Second Presidential Debate".
I mean, I want you to have freaky orgasmic fun to entertain me, but I don’t want you to risk HIV or car crashes
Randomize
