How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
I knew I shouldn't have slept with her...my dick looks like a stegosaurus tail
I am currently in the waffle making stage of highness
I told them I got hit by a car again and now im pretty sure they think im being abused but there was no way in hell the truth was going to fly. Employed people aren't supposed to break their faces in piggy back ride accidents.
Hillary is trying to make pickle pops with vodka and sell them to kids at the ball park.
I'm pretty sure this city writes new vice laws specifically because of us.
I'm drunk at a gay bar with my riding crop. God save the queens
Today's been pretty great, I went and bought the new Batman for the sole purpose of masturbating to Bane
At one point during xmas dinner my whole family was double fisting. It was like thats how I learned to drink moment
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
White girls? They're everywhere. In packs. Drunk white girl packs.
I don't need to know how horny your mother is, hun.
I went from looking for a bong to home decor in a 10 minute span. This is what being an adult is all about!
Randomize
