Apparently mid blow job I started crying telling her how "Wonderful this blow job is"
she was rubbing her elbow against the fish tank and laughing hysterically then she said I'M THEIR FISHY GOD and watched harry potter
She is ok w me having sex for money. Just gotta find rich grandmas.
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
I just laid my head on this pillow and I smelt your penis. It was comforting.
Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
ok thanks goodnight
Also before you go to bed i just have to get it out there that i really like macklemore as a person
Deciding whether to take my sex toys home for Christmas will be the biggest decision I make this holiday season
His buddy came running in the room after we had sex, and started "sponging" the sweat off my forehead with his sport wristband.
"This is Emily. She likes potatoes. And sometimes laughs and cries at the same time, and has a wonderful butt"
I've orgasmed so many times tonight I think I've become enlightened
Current dream situation- Gordon Ramsey is my Uber driver and he's hauling around a backseat filled with chocolate covered açai berries. I'm good for eternity.
Yeah yeah I know I have to bring your dog back.
we've talked on the toilet we're linked now
So is he the one who got away?
They all got away. I’m a catch and release kind of girl.
Randomize
