I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
Mom's drinking. Just asked her if she was good to walk back to the condo. She seemed unsure until she remembered she brought the GPS. We are 2 blocks from the condo.
weed brownie and a latte, breakfast of champions
She talked about nothing but beanie babies for 45 minutes. I'm never getting high with her again.
I just realized i came back home with my lei that one night. How do i forget my bra but remember my lei?
Just considered the plausability of using my detachable showerhead as a beer bong. Has my life really devolved to this?
I'm not holding out much hope. She met me in a nighclub when I was arguing with the cigarette machine
my dad just paid them in porn...i no longer feel guilty for getting hammered and not helping
A man just sang Jennifer Lopez to me out his car window. I am not sure how I feel about this, but it is not positively.
Just went over my top ten highlight reel with that guy I'm fucking. It was like we were sports announcers. But about sex.
I'm up in my room and I just saw a naked guy sprint out into the streets from my mom's party downstairs
Like he was trying to be sexy but he had shit taste in porn so i left
Dude \nSo embarrassed \nJust sent a snap to my boss john and noticed my vibrator was right beside me
I have more important things to worry about than you drowning your cheerios in tequila.
I feel like he doesn't realize we're offering him a threeway with sisters and I don't understand how that's possible.
Maybe we should bring mom next time.
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