It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
He told me he was a psychology major, and I responded by asking him where he hid his vagina.
Well, we missed our public lewdness court date. Looks like were going to jail in Alabama ...
Why hello there Olivia! How are you today on this fine and most wonderful morning full of magic and adventure and awesomeness?
Someone just got laid.
You threw a bunch of trashcans into the middle of the street and nothing happened. I fell on one car and suddenly there were cops everywhere...
When I start carrying a bottle in my hand, jumping from boat to boat with a grenade horn. YOU should know this isn't going to turn out well.
Everyone already knows you're a drunk, they understand.
He said I went to go sit outside and is promised I wouldn't leave he brings me a chair and I'm gone. He found me stumbling a half mile away in my socks
Really because I got kicked out the eagles game for running up n down the steps singing ' fly eagles fly ' then punched a Dallas fan in the face before the game even started..
These fuzzy pants work great for sleeping, taking an exam, getting baked and watching the hobbit. I guess i'm not changing pants for 72 hours.
you said I shouldn't try to fill the void in my meaningless life with dicks but i am trying and it totally works
I threw up in my backpack last night, but at least it wasn't in the pizza box again
Last night I realized I made a dick appt 2 MONTHS IN ADVANCE!!!!....... WHO THE HELL DOES THAT!?!? LMAO!
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
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