The only thing I want to hear out of a girl's mouth tonight is, "slurp".
quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
I'm not saying going to the volleyball games drunk on Tuesday night was a bad idea I'm just saying we shouldn't make a routine of it.
By the way when you were super fucked up last night, you ate cat food and tried to tell me it was healthy for you
Hello Officers/Paramedics, judging by last night, my friend is dead. The money in his pockets is mine, he owed me. Please send me directions to whichever morgue/strip club for pick up.
Hahaha my philosophy professor just opened class with "I had a shitty weekend and I was at the bar until 815 this morning. So bear with me".
He let me finish eating my sandwich while I sat his face. I think I'm in love with this little eager beaver.
There was a huge crash. I came out of my room to find you sprawled out at the bottom of the stairs in your bra and panties. You looked at me, yelled 'WHAT AM I DOING WITH MY LIFE' and then ran back into his room.
And you were like wow I love water shots they taste so good
Just paid for my STD meds using a giftcard I got for Christmas. Thanks mom.
My sex toys have been held in customs for almost a month now. They're British, what the hell?!?
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
Randomize
