Bea Arthur died yesterday
You shut your stupid mouth
Betty White is next, I just know it.
Betty White will never die! She's like Dick Clark. Rue McCalahan is next.
BEES IN MY FUCKING PANTS. HELP.
for future reference: playing drunken strip-twister is a euphemism for a threesome. just thought you should know.
He's just giving off this "someone be a bitch to me" vibe
please, i've had weekends with less dignity than this.
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
The highlight of my night was when you proclaimed that the man standing next to you smelt like grape medicine...
Are we on the same shift tomorrow and more importantly do you want your pants back?
I do feel like I owe you an apology for trying to fuck your dad last night but in my defense everyone knows I shouldn't drink tequila.
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
Today one of my patients offered me pot brownies. Medical school worth it. Living the dream.
Whenever someone said no you would yell "Die Motherfucker." Kind of like some twisted drinking game.
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
Is it sad that my idea of a quality foursome would involve one person eating me out while the other two rub my feet?
Of course he did! You’ve seen my tits, you know he didn’t stand a chance!
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