Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
umm..so Dad's wearing a thong, I don't know what to do
put a dollar in it?
called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
i forgot i changed ur name in my phone to "the situation" so when u texted me i got really excited for a hot second
i thought we decided on me being "the altercation" instead
My vagina hasn't been this smooth since I was 8. I better get laid tonight.
I just ditched my friends to hang out with the chilis restaurant crew...one of these girls better have daddy issues
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
He was so good, that I'm pretty sure he fucked his religion into me. P.S. I'm Jewish now.
After everything you did, you followed it with "Oh God, that's something a high person would do. But I'm not high." So yeah, you're not getting near my stash again.
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
That's why we don't trade sex for Taco Bell. It's called the dollar menu.
There is a drunken, assless white chick here at this bar wearing a shirt that says "REAL WOMEN TWERK FOR JESUS". I have officially had it with our generation.
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
I woke up at 2 AM to find them in my living room with a radio flyer wagon full of milk glass plates and a Holstein cow. How am I going to explain this to my landlord!?!
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
Randomize
