Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
If i'm not hungover, near death, and wondering what i did the night before on Monday, life is not worth living.
Pass out mid-funnel last night.
I woke up on a raft in a bath tub filled with beer. excellent night.
I would like to apologize for asking to take advantage of you, wishing you a horny Hanukkah and whatever "abd ethw prnym to mzbe yur penis cna be friends" means.
STOP CALLING ME LADY CHLAMYDIA
Also, I found out tonight a major plus for being female is you can accidentally call the hot bartender sweet tits and she won't get mad.
Couple of things: my nipples are blue and knowing that at some point I'm going to have to poop is incredibly terrifying
Is it weird that I noticed my lower half feels strange and then further realized it's bc I'm wearing underwear to bed for the first time in weeks..maybe months?
What i love about my dog is i can lay in bed and masturbate with him at the foot, and he just leaves me alone.
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
Hey, before I head out, whats your policy on casual drug use and one night stands?
True life: I got so drunk that i took a shower with my clothes on at 4 am...
How does the curb feel today?
It's stronger than my elbow. But I found my lighter while I was down there.
Randomize
