I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
Im bringing wine tonight. Its from a merlot from nashville. i bet it'll taste like infidelity and teenage pregnancy.
Omg. Never. Take a laxative the day you are going on. A date.
I just wished the taco bell drive thru guy a happy cinco de mayo. Who says arizonians hate mexicans?
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
You need to always be prepared. Like a sex firefighter.
The only thing that was weird was that it WASN'T weird when she got out of the shower and saw me blowing him.
Home safe. Took me everything not to stop and pick up some random cat that looked like an ocelot tho.
So stoned i forgot i was in bed
I blasted the Halloween Before Christmas soundtrack last night so my roommate wouldn't hear me having sex. Needless to say the sex got a little weird.
I sense lesbianism
That's a weird power
I would professionally fuck the shit out of her
I smell of tequila and Im going to a funeral. This is my life.
Randomize
