Broke my phone, have no voice AND I was blackout by 3 p.m...I'm betting I had a great time.
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
i had the all of mcdonalds chanting USA as he motorboated you
there's a guy pushing a keg up the street in a shopping cart. you have to love graduation
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
The cute guy in my class hurt himself and is on crutches. My first thought was "Good. He'll be easier to take down." Like he's a gazelle and I'm a dick tiger. What's wrong with me?
Woke up this morning buried in a mountain of chex mix and bubble wrap. We must have been doing something great last night
Of course I will... FYI I just gave my balls a crew cut.
i was really hopeful that i could make it to the end of the semester without doing something stupid enough to destroy our relationship but i guess i was wrong..........thanks vodka
Ok let me just clear up this blowjob thing first so we can talk about your grandpa
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
It's a sad statement on my day when the high point was getting a pap test.
Listen, I booty called my boss last night from the company phone. I may need to brush up my resume.
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