I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
ugly people sure do ruin things
I'm making a contract of things you're not allowed to put in my ass
Just saw a 300lb woman fall down. Shes screaming like a beached manatee. Her 120lb boyfriend is trying to push her up. It's like watching an infant try to bench
I was asking the bouncer, "if I fall will you catch me?" which then turned into "if I jump off the roof will you catch me?" He said no.
do i respond to the booty call for the guy with the bigger dick or the one who has the gourmet coffee i like so much? at this point i'm leading toward the coffee
We had sex in the church bell tower and somehow it still feels right.
I feel like my dick pic collection should be archived at the Smithsonian
She texted me this morning asking why all of her house pillows were inside her mini-van.
So thats where i built my buckingham palace
Somehow, you looked so classy chugging that bottle of wine last night.
Mom saw my dick pic over my gf's shoulder. She told her she really should've had me circumcised.
Can I just swipe right on his dad?
A sultry night of tacos and sex sounds nice. Should I bring home milk?
About the whale....I wasn't completely awake.
Randomize
