Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
normally I beat off every night before I go to bed even though my little brother sleeps in the same room. So I was starting to last night, and he jumped out of bed and said "Fuck, Im not listening to this shit again" We havent talked since. fuck me
it's not our fault the pink and the sink are so close together.
you assured me you'd make it home safe because your pizza rolls were waiting up for you.
the girls on my floor started fighting over who got to keep the random hoodies that boys forgot in my room after sex
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
I thanked her dad for "firing off a good one" when she was conceived. She said thats why he doesnt like me.
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
It says a lot about the way my life is going right now that 'there's no shit in your house' is fucking good news.
Holy shit my cat won't leave the lube alone
We found out if you get Ben high but stay sober yourself he is an AWESOME cook. You need to get your ass down here, this goes against everything I know to be real.
Went home with a guy last night with Taco Bell sauce in my hair and on my pants
I just put poptarts in the toaster with the wrapper on, that's how hungover I am.
Passed out in someones front yard last night. Got woke u?p by a lady walking her dog at 6am. Rock bottom.
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
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