He actually believes he's not an alcoholic if he doesn't go to meetings.
I can't believe you're fucking in the bar bathroom, but everyone else can, and they're really proud.
Truth be told I was googling "why is my left calf bigger than my right calf", porn would've been a better excuse for a virus.
Dude that bathroom stall was not tall enough to be doing lines in, guys kept peeking over and giving us high fives
he texted me at 3am asking for "one of my famous blowjobs"
I have a gyno appt today. I hate it when the Army gets involved with my vagina.
We got out of the car in valet drinking beers we gave the valet one as a tip
When she sees your dick for the first time, tell her it glows blue when orcs are close
I cancelled the entertainment for your b-day party.... Keep the bouncy castle just in case.
Idk I'm sorry it's weird to ask for testimonials on your penis
do you ever just look around and think about how great it is to have depth perception? Like it's really, really cool when u think about it
Don't be the guy that has his dick out at work.
NO ITS THAT IM A SEXUAL DEVIANT AND CANT FILTER MYSELF
Who did he bring home?
Idk. But did you see her shoe choice by the stairs, I'm really not expecting anything great.
According to the rule of quantum porn mechanics, the mere thought of something kinky causes it to exist. So out there, somewhere, there is already riddler/smurf porn...
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