Worst sexual experience IN MY LIFE. And now i know why it makes jesus cry.
Sex on a kitchen table is not as amazing as they make is seem in the movies.
you told him you liked to chip your nail polish to look like different countries. im gonna guess that no, you didn't sleep with him.
He was wearing his Class of 2007 shirt so I sat there for 5 minutes and read all the names of the guys I can remember giving head to.
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
she wouldn't play beer pong with me unless I took off the rollerskates.
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
You could breast feed yourself wine!! This shit is genius!
For reals. He's my age and he still hangs out at his frat house & gets hammered every weekend. Idk if I'm jealous of him or if I pity him
I emptied a Vyvance capsule into my coffee pot last night and set the auto start. Pretty sure I've been drinking meth all morning
Nah, I was done when the Big Pun lookalike began to sob and tell me I looked like his ex...
You went outside, peed in the front yard, and asked me to bring you some toilet paper.
If you can throw 105 mph it’s mandatory that you’re hung.
She pregamed while taking a shower. Came out clean and drunk.
He broke both of his legs jumping out of a window to escape a coyote.
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