so i slept on a park bench last night...no hobo
if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
im keeping my plan b box as a souvenir of my first halloween weekend in college
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
I made out with the bride. You tell me how my night was
Maybe shotgunning 4 days after oral surgery wasn't such a good idea after all...
He ate me out like a beaver on a tree. I've never been so scared in my life
She had cheddar bay biscuits in her purse. Biscuits, Id and cash. I'm gonna marry her.
So I found out me and this guy I was drinking beer with tonight both got lactated on by the same stripper. We're milk brothers.
I just got hit on at the bar by a guy who used his mother as a wingman, she was pretty convincing. Only in Stratford.
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
If you're wondering about the mess, we had sex in the kitchen. There was noodles involved.
I find celibacy oppressive. Huge waste of my time and talents.
It makes my nipple hurt just thinking about it.
There's nothing like a guy talking about your vagina as if it's delicious food to make your day better.
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