Omg. If Ina Garten Makes roast chicken one more time im going to strangle her with her white button down
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
I just made Jack Daniels snow cones.
First lesson of the year: don't close the bar on mondays
I'm just here to guide your spirit, avoiding herpes is on you though
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
And then he told me he was too tired for me to suck his dick. Physically and mentally too tired for me to suck his dick. What the fuck?
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
Also, there's the possibility of falling 5 feet to your death to make it more exciting
In which case I will yell FIVE SECOND RULE and continue to slam you
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
My penis is saying yes, several less important organs are saying noo...
the guy next to you kind of looks like a penguin. i'm going to fuck him
Sooooo drunk. We had the best sex ever and after he looked at me and said "That's whats up". I looked at him weird and he said "Young Jeezy would say it" and passed out on me naked. I think i might be in love
Randomize
