Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
my mother and i just seriously had a convorsation about why you cant Google "Refurbished Dildos"
Her tattoo has the intellectual profundity of snakes on a plane except you can't laugh.
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
I farted on Jack's balls last night. He got pissed and walked away cause he knew it was on purpose. I couldn't hold it in anymore.
Between the two of us weve fucked every guy at this table
I remember coming home with a cat... I havent seen it all day. Shit.
He made off the wall shots in beer pong, stuck the girls dog in a cooler, and played with swords with her mom. I wish I got his name
But first time having sex and he went down on me twice?! I'm gonna marry this guy
I'll make sure to include that in my bridesmaid toast
Some girl took her panties off, soaked them in vodka and wrung them out into a line of guys' mouths! Awesome!
No, NOT awesome. Where the fuck do you go drinking!?!
I just can't even fathom the crazy and I work at a mental hospital.
I really couldn't care less what she looks like. That's why The Lord Our God gave us doggy-style.
We took your mom out drinking and we wound up winning 18 games of Flip Cup. You have amazing genetics.
You will bone me until my eyeballs fall out. This is not a request.
Randomize
