you know its a sad night when you can actually see and hear sitcoms on at the bar
the most drunk i have ever been? possibly. the most drunk i have ever been on a monday? definently.
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
So was it you or me who decided it was a good idea to inscribe fuck you on the counter?
That was me. Just a 'welcome to our home' kinda thing.
I'm tired of stuffing my fat into a slutty costume. Next year let's go as homeless girls. Cute ones. In leggings with camel toe.
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
Are you two whores ready for me to turn the light on so you can see what you came home with last night?
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
I LIKE NICE BOXERS OKAY!? COMBINED WITH A GLORIOUS DICK JUST MAKES THIS EVEN BETTER. WE MOVE IN TOGETHER AND THAT PIC'S GETTIN FUCKING FRAMED.
We got stuck in traffic in the tunnel while we were smoking weed. We were afraid to air out the car.
You spent the entire night trying to get me to make out with you
yeah I remember. your boyfriend shouldnt have cheered me on though.
I'm not drinking for the rest of the week. I need discipline, celery, dick, and a bible.
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
Your friend was nice but you didn't have to bang her in my kitchen...just sayin.
The only good thing about 2020 is that the hot flight attendant neighbors are using my pool a lot. If i can keep them from wandering into my Zoom meeting with my boss I’m golden
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