How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
The old woman next to me on the el smells like cupcakes...but she doesn't taste like cupcakes
is it wrong that I want a "Where The Wild Things Are" tshirt that points to my junk?
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
I walked in on him cutting a hole in the condom.
rather than putting your name in guys phones, you just texted 90999 to donate $10 to Haiti and then gave it back to them
and his room smelled like strippers, childrens tears, and fear
I don't think we had sex because when I woke up he was still wearing the chicken suit.
No he exists. Who else tells me no matter how drunk I am to pull out. He's watching over me so my bastard doesn't get created.
If you call getting home safe by sprinting down Spanish Harlem barefoot still rolling then ya I made it
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
That sad moment when even your drug dealer lands a summer internship and you don't...
And I just want you to know I got myself into this mess. I gotta get myself out. Plus, don't you only need one kidney?
I have not brushed my hair. I'm wearing a yoga hoodie. I look like I slept in a gutter somewhere. Today is going to be a good day.
I swear, the guy behind me wasn't paying attention until the words "middle aged fuckboy" came out of my mouth.
Randomize
