Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
It took us hanging out like four times to kiss. Id like to fuck you before I'm 30
And you just kept trying to fit through the dog door and not drop Jello shots.
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
I should show up to the gym drunk more often. I felt like i really motivated all the fat people.
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
I am making pancakes and watching Spongebob Squarepants. My life is a waste of youth.
I would like to request a high five for getting laid while wearing crocs and a crab hat.
I'm surprised they let us keep partying at that hotel bar, that's like the 3rd time I've had to try blocking the view of him peeing off the balcony. I earn my free drinks.
Just to clarify, I'm still tripping balls
On an unrelated note, I've come up with a theory of everything
I'm shotgunning a meatball sub and watching flip or flop. i have reached a new level of singledom.
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
You wanna come over?
Too high to be booty called. My cereal is growing hair.
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
we had to take 10 shots sometime before midnight, then 11 shots between midnight and 1. so yes its gonna be a rough day.
Randomize
