the fundamentals of my vasectemy are strong
There comes a time in every man's life where he has to shit in a catbox to prove a point.
Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
Chipotle chips and wine for breakfast. Its def game day
I knew as soon as I saw that pole that I was going to wake up the next morning with bruises.
Couldn't find any balloons, so we're doing whippets out of condoms. Being a ho has its benefits.
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
Friends don't brand friends with cigars. It's not how it works.
For not really liking Christmas, I have an astounding amount of holiday-themed lingerie
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
Just almost drowned myself in the shower again. I need an adult.
He's UNCIRCUMCISED. And it curves. Two things I've never encountered in all my sluttiness and they're both on the hottest guy alive. :(
Is there any reason why a taxidermic donkey head is in the shower?
Randomize
