its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
oh god all I remember is forward rolls down the corridor and all I have to show for it is "fit Romanian guy" saved in my phone
You demanded I give you a glass of water, so I set it down in front of you and you knock it over and roll in it..,
I wanted to be a dolphin.
I give him a gold star every time I orgasm. His room looks like he's freaking King Midas.
Dude. I have so much pot that i only worry about running out of lighters
She spilled creme de menthe on her crotch and I told her she looked like a menstruating Vulcan (costume idea!). Obviously, I went home alone.
He stumbled into my room, flopped on my bed, shoes on my pillow and asked me for a juice box. Then fell asleep with the juice box on his forehead.
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
I never thought I'd say this, but I think I just saw the hottest pregnant chick alive.
I'm turning twenty & the only honorable way to exit my teens is by slapping the fuck outta the bag. You better be in.
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
My legs r really sober for running now
I don't think that's how sobriety works.
my brother has friends over and I can hear one of them screaming from the basement "BREATHE. FILL YOUR LUNGS. LIVE YOUR LIFE." and it sounds like he's doing some motivational speaking down there but that's actually just how he encourages ppl to take bong hits
I feel like I got hit by a car. But a small car, like a Beetle or a Mini or something.
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