Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
just got pizza delivered to the hot tub. its easier than i thought to be this lazy
If he eats mayonnaise, he's not getting laid. End of story.
What I lack in compassion I make up for in lack of compassion
I kinda wish he had even a slight idea of the sex I'm planning for his departure. I'm literally studying for it.
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
Thanks for the morning blowjob. Scientifically proven you can't have a bad day if it starts with a blowjob.
When you say shenanigans does that mean I should bring birth control?
he asked me if i wanted to hook up & my answer was 'why not'. he came in thirty seconds and the condom broke. it's the love story of the century
My arms in a cast, how am I supposed to have sex with only one hand?
more importantly I need two hands to eat pie
I puked in the back of my mom's new car because I had too much to drink at Chilis. I think I just hit rock bottom.
Woke up in the hospital naked with my id's taped to my chest. Also apparently puked on two guys, two girls and an escalade (at the same time). Good night.
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
just bought safety googles to wear so he can cum on my face and not in my eye. SAFETY FIRST!
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