Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
The difference between you and me last night was that I didn't remember getting into the cab and you didnt know we were in one.
Come down here. We are watching people walk through the paper we taped in front of the elevator.
This is what we get for YOLOing our way to obesity
When did we convert life to cartoon?
Can you work for me at 4? We might have just taken some drugs we found in the couch and... end of story
Guess who figured out you can fit an entire bottle of champagne in a big Subway cup. Open container laws my ass.
I don't even remember what he looks like. All I know is he's 6 foot 100. I like that.
I'm hoarding IKEA meatballs in my purse
My cat just smacked my blunt from my hand and then put her head in my hand. I don't know how to feel
Okay I'm ready to show you that my weiner still works
Too late, I'm convinced it's broken
I emptied a Vyvance capsule into my coffee pot last night and set the auto start. Pretty sure I've been drinking meth all morning
Ate a slug for 39 dollars
I wouldn't expect anything less from a PhD student
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
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