The party tonight has no theme but I decided to go as a home wrecker.
soooo.. i guess the cop said he'd drop the charges if i go to some AA meetings and i said fuck AA. not one of my better choices.
Would love to except that I crashed into a hearse in a funeral procession about an hour ago so I think that pretty much put an end to my day.
at which point I apparently ran in and shouted "I made the sex with that one!"
the tile , carpet , walls , cabinets , even the ceiling ... there is Jello everywhere
it was your idea to have indoor Jello wrestling man
He was with one girl when I went to bed, wad with another when I woke up and now he just told me he was with a 3rd in-between last night and this morning. Jesus Christ.
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
it's like I can see my whorish nature reflected back at me in his wedding ring.
All I really remember is thinking that the music looked like beautiful lizard waves in my head
The strip club incident sums up our friendship pretty well
I think i was just meant to be a stripper. A ballerina stripper cat
Hahahahahha. You saved a homeless man. You're actually the mother Teresa of skanks.
We will let tequila do the talkin this weekend
We were dancing and then he pointed to the club floor and there was money that I dropped everywhere. That was the nicest thing someone has ever done for me.
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
Randomize
