your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
oh, also, we're locked out of the house and we're going to have to take shelter with the hot, poss single, dad next door. i hope this turns into a porno
she went to pee and i could hear her singing "Drip Drip Drop LIttle April Showers" from Bambi through the door.
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
Pregnant only lasts nine months, being hot takes way longer to go away. So yes, I will continue to hit on the hot pregnant girl.
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
He just showed up with a bottle of wild turkey a half a can of coke and some marshmallows yelling "gobble gobble bitches" my roommates hate my cousin
Oh my god there's only so much masturbating one can do before one wants to fucking cry
I just paid for weed by taking him to the store to buy cheese so he could make empanadas. Best. Drug deal. Ever.
I came home and my mom goes "why are you barefoot and where the hell are your shoes?" and I replied "I have French fries"
Don't do it. He's got a dick the size of a baseball bat. You don't want that commitment.
I have to. For the sake of science.
You tried to see how many socks you can stuff in yor mouth and I just put on a damp sock. Is this what bestfriends have come to these days???
Upon further investigation my nipples are bruised and I have teeth marks all over.
Ugh. All the good hoes are in their third trimester.
Randomize
