in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
You know, if there were no such thing as marriage, i don't think porn would exist.
you were so high you were expressing yourself in action figures
we were playing true or dare on a webcam chat and i was way to drunk ...i ended up having to drink my own piss outta a beer bottle, life couldnt get any worse right now
when you agree to fuck a guy it does by NO means make it okay for his roommate to hide in the closet with doritos and watch
he said something along the lines of "fish can smell fear"
So like 5 seconds in I realize I knew him in 3rd grade and I went limp in his mouth. It felt like I just murdered the last unicorn ever. Going straight never felt like an option till now.
Also I think I'm starting to get calluses on my hands from my level of sexual activity
Reminder: You could have had sex with me while wearing a tiara.
PENIS EMOJIS WOULD MAKE MY LIFE SO MUCH EASIER GAH WHY DOES THE WORLD HATE ME
If muffins & morning blowjobs don't make him happy, frankly, I don't think anything will.
Anyone who does not consider cereal and wine as a balanced breakfast needs to leave immediately.
That was before I lit my hair on fire
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
The amount of illegal things I've done this weekend is astounding.
Randomize
